Nine (Blog) Years.

I'm not sure what led me to the blog this morning. But I discovered upon visiting that today is City in my Soul's birthday! Happy 9th birthday! I can still recall sitting in Cafe Eclectic in Memphis back in 2008 preparing to pack up my life (seven years there) and embark on a new adventure to Athens, GA to pursue a graduate degree in higher education. My how life has changed in these past eight years! And my hair color. Definitely my hair color. #Embracethegrey

I've been settled in NOLA almost four and a half years now and have found my rhythm. My condo in Uptown New Orleans is the longest I've lived anywhere aside from my family home. And though I'm now in my third position at Tulane, it's the longest employer I've had since beginning my career in higher education twelve years ago.

So looking back on these past nine years, what have I learned? I've learned that change is the only thing that's constant. I've learned to step outside my comfort zone and be stretched. I've learned that growth only happens when you're vulnerable. I learned to love and I learned to heal. I learned how important community is as both a feeling and a place. I've grown deeper in my faith and have focused on giving grace and on trying to make the world a better place. My friends often comment on how grounded I seem - how anchored I am to my values. I learned in these past nine years that the work starts with me and I'm no good to anyone else if I'm not good to myself. I've learned to name and sit in the mess and that brokenness is temporary and wholeness isn't a gift someone gives to you. It's a journey you have to commit to and believe in.

In the past four and half years of dating and looking for the "one", I've learned that relationships require an investment. I've learned that sacrifice and grace and compassion and communication and intention are necessary ingredients for a solid foundation. I've learned that being true to yourself doesn't mean being stubborn; it means trusting your gut and not settling. Life's too short for that. I've learned that love isn't simply enough and that the world (and relationships) are messy. I've learned that honesty and vulnerability and transparency and authenticity aren't elements of weakness. They are signs of strength. I've learned that maybe there isn't a "one". Maybe there's just the person who you commit to. Who challenges and inspires you to the best you and who fills your days with laughter and love and happiness.

I've learned in these past nine years that there's no room for bullshit. I've learned that you can spend your whole life focusing on the negativity but that will always require more energy than focusing on the light and being positive. I've learned that as technology increases the ways we can stay connected it also reduces the focus on the human connection. I've learned I'm wired for human connection and that requires nurturing and commitment.

I've learned that labels are nothing but categories to help us organize information and if we organize people in this way, we're playing small. I've learned the danger of a single story and the value of a narrative. I've learned that I get to choose who I am, how I identify, and how I want to show up. I've learned that I've still got A LOT of learning to do when it comes to equity and inclusion. I've learned the importance of "just showing up" (thanks, NP!) and thanking others for doing the same.

I've learned to swing for the fences and to brave the arena and overcome the fear of falling flat on my face. I've learned to get up and rise strong (thanks, Brene!). I've learned that how you play the game matters and the ripples you create matter and that love will always win.

The blog turned nine and next month I'll celebrate 35 years. I'm grateful for the journey and the learning. And excited to see where this crazy thing we call life continues to take me.

Cheers.