Thank You for flying

June is around the corner. That means we're almost halfway into 2010 and as I reflect on the past five months, it dawns on me that I've spent a significant amount of time in airports. Like way more than in any other five month span. In the past five months, I've flown to Seattle, Chicago, Dallas, Nashville, Tallahassee, Austin, St. Louis, and Blacksburg, Va. I've spent time in the Atlanta, Chicago, Dallas, Nashville, Tallahassee, Austin, St. Louis, Houston, New Orleans, and Roanoke airports. It's enough to boggle the mind. I thought about trying to figure out how many miles that is but I decided it's a feat I didn't want to undertake.

Nevertheless, I'm now considering myself an expert in airport travel and surprisingly with all of those trips, only the most recent to Roanoke/Blacksburg was plagued by bad weather, G-D-N awful flight delays, and possible flight cancellations. Other than that, it was all smooth sailing. Not bad for the airlines these days (even though I heard on Jimmy last night that in a recent report of the 10 best airlines around the world, NONE of the US airlines made the list. Not really surprised though...)

But as a result of all of my flying, I've accumulated a short list of things that drive me apeshitake when traveling:

1. Putting your seat back to recline. Yes, I understand that it's more comfortable for YOU but it's inconsiderate and rude and a pain in the arse for the person behind you. Their tray table hits them in the gut, they are practically unable to move their legs and when the space between you and the next person is already close enough to french kiss, I don't need you all up in my junk as well. So next time you're flying, suck it up and don't recline. Your neighbor behind you will appreciate it.

2. Carrying on cell conversations on the plane. I get it if you need to call someone quick to let them know you landed, your flight is delayed, you left, you arrived, etc. What I don't get is the people who feel the need to carry on a 20 minute convo with their BFF Jill about things no one else needs to be privy too. Don't you realize EVERYONE can hear your conversation? We're on a plane! Hellur!? I don't need to hear about your last meal or the dress you have on or what you did prior to getting on the plane or what you're gonna do after you get off the plane.

3. Not waiting your turn to exit the plane. Perhaps your mama never taught you better to WAIT YOUR TURN. Or perhaps you missed that lesson that entire year in kindergarten. Either way, get with the program. Perhaps you've never flown before and you missed the memo but the way we load the plane is not the way we get off the plane. There's a process. You wait for everyone in front of you to get off before you do. I cannot stand the people who jump up IMMEDIATELY after the fasten seat belt sign dings and goes off. It's as if they have ants in their pants. They have not a second to spare to open up the overhead, pull down their oversized carry on (that really isn't carry on regulations anyway) and push their way up to the front, totally oblivious to everyone else around them.

I know there's more but these are the ones that immediately come to mind after my recent three trips this past week. I'm thankful to be on the ground permanently for a bit with no immediate trips in sight.

Cheers.